Straight up going to firstly clarify I mean that in the furthest sense of anti LGBT meaning ever. Girls you love and be who ever the hell you want. Got no issue. Meg Turney if you are listening… HMU. And so, what I mean is, as a rule – I bloody hate girls. It takes something really special about you for me to go “Yeah this fellow vagina bearing human is nice.” Now it’s not down to me thinking I am some superior female. No, it’s more because Girls growing up were snide and mean and bitchy. Let them in and then they piss on you. Not all were. But most. I am generalising. However, boys are just cool. Like they just are happy to do whatever. Just goofing about is awesome, like making Mentos and Pop rockets and seeing them do dumb shit like setting their eyebrows on fire. Making plans is a breeze. Just tell them where they have to be and that’s it. But girls. Oh god. I am one of these people that feel girls are always staring or waiting to talk about me the moment I leave a room. And yes I know you think “But you do draw attention to yourself in bright colours and sequins” and to that I say “Fuck it. They going to find something else to say”. I am not very good at being a Girl and that seems to be fantastic gossip fodder to people I have never met who cast a glance over me, shuffling into my office whilst balancing a Soya Latte and Muffin on my head trying to unlock the office door half asleep at 8.30am.

But now. It’s all changed.

I have made a girly friend. Proper girly friend. Knows more about me than I do kind of girly friend. We burp together and talk inappropriately to each other making her brother (my S.O) very uncomfortable being in the same room. We both love to start crochet projects together under a shared blanket at 11pm, eating entire packets of biscuits and watching some dark documentary on Netflix. And this whole thing is beautiful. She is beautiful.

It’s hard not to say that my Main Boy ‘Zuka (love you) had not only blessed me with himself that day he swiped up, but also to bring me a true best friend in his Sister.

Fuck. Enough of the soppy stuff. I guess basically what I am saying is outside of the realms of a romantic capacity, there are wonderful people to bless your life and support you and nuture you. Sometimes those people are a struggle to find. Don’t loose who you are to toxic people. Cut them fuckers dead. You wouldn’t stay with a twat dude, so don’t feel friendships are any different. You gotta look after you and surround yourself with who you want to be around. You don’t even need to have more than one friend. You are your top Bitch. But make sure you always have your JC to your LC.


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